This is how I feel when you text-ask me out.

Q: Is it ok to ask a girl out via text message?

A: That depends. Is this a Skype date with a girl in another country? It isn't? Then no.

Look, I'm old-fashioned. I'll admit it. I prefer to call someone over texting in most instances, date-asking aside. I'm also a big fan of putting in some effort. You know what takes the minimum amount of effort? Texting. That's like telling a girl you want to cook dinner for her, then heating up a can of Spaghetti-Os. The female sex deserves better.

Aside from the laziness factor, it also denotes level of cowardice. It's a lot harder to get a live, in-real-time rejection than via text. You have to be ready with a gracious concession speech while holding back a torrent of choking sobs. Okay, it shouldn't be that emotional, but taking some time to craft a simple text is much easier on the nerves. Making an actual call takes some spine. And since it's a first date, I assume this is early on in the relationship and you're still working on your initual impressions. You need to think about what image you want to project: A gallant gentleman who phones his lady-love like in the good ol' days? Or a wuss that's been castrated by the technological age?

Here's the other thing about written word communication: A lot of the message gets lost in translation. I can't tell you how many times my sarcasm's inability to transfer through text has led to unintentional insults (sorry, Mom!). You don't want your first attempt at a first date to get mucked up and confused because you can't pick up a phone like an adult and use that thing in your mouth called a tongue. Yes, it does have more uses than sticking it to a frozen pole for entertainment.

Finally, it's my contention that texting is the language of friends. It's efficient at mass-organzing get-togethers or sending an address, but it's not a platform for any real conversation. By getting a text from you, the girl might not realize that you're asking her out in a serious manner. Do you really want to get stuck in the dreaded "friend zone"? Because that shit is romantic quicksand. 

You get what you put in, my friend. Try putting in some effort.